In labor all creation groans
Till fear and hatred cease,
Till human hearts have understood:
In Christ alone is peace.
In labor all creation groans
Till false divisions cease,
Till differences are reconciled
In Christ who is our peace.
In labor all creation groans
God's justice to increase.
When right in place of might prevails,
Then Christ will be our peace.
- Delores Dufner, from Magnificat, January 2023
Finally finishing up my flannel skirt. I've also gone into my yarn stash, to try and work it down a little bit,
and found this cute pattern on Etsy.
The reading challenge this year requires a Jane Austen work I hadn't read. We have Sanditon at the library, so I read it. Well, that is I read eleven chapters, which is the part of the book that Jane wrote. The rest has been finished by someone, and I decided to skip it. I'll probably pick up Lady Susan at some point, but for now I'm re-reading Persuasion. Also, Rescuing Socrates, about the value of a liberal arts education by a fellow from the Dominican Republic, who is now teaching at Columbia. I just began it, but it's very promising.
Well! It's been snowing all day!
I wait for this. It can't last; the daytime temperatures are above freezing, and it rained a fair amount before the snow.
Meanwhile, Daisy broke the kitchen clock.
I'd rather focus on the snow.
The birds came along in late afternoon, to fill up. There was much to-ing and fro-ing but the video was too long for blogger, and I couldn't put it up.
A cardinal, and some smaller birds. I imagine their world is a whole lot different when there's a blanket of white over everything, as far as food goes. The snow was a little heavy and there was some wind, and the power "blinked" more than once. The oven even cut off, while the chicken was in it.
Now, all is quiet.
Pray without ceasing, pray,
Your captain gives the word;
His summons cheerfully obey
And call upon the Lord;
To God your every want
In instant prayer display,
Pray always; pray and never faint,
Pray, without ceasing, pray!
- Charles Wesley,
from Magnificat, January 2023
She runs over to watch when I buzz the stuff off my sweater; she flies into the bathroom if she hears the water running and the door's open. Just now my brother is writing something on a pad in his lap, and he said she was watching; he said she noticed that the pen was making marks on the paper. That's interesting! When the water runs into the sink, she is focused on the water that accumulates, not on the stream coming down. So it's very intriguing to me that she is looking at the result - if you can put it that way (with the sweaters, I'm not sure what she's observing).
I told her she's just like Aristotle.
It snowed a little bit this morning again, but then melted into the damp, warm ground shortly after. I feel hesitant to complain, since maybe winter will just have a late start - it's happened before.
I appreciate every. flake. A bit of snow changes the vibe for the whole day.
There's a Polish group at church - maybe a prayer group or Bible study or both? I don't know, but they had a Christmas party last Sunday, with an invitation to everyone to come; it was a potluck. I don't have any Polish dishes I make, so I just roasted carrots with cranberries, maple syrup, orange peel, and seasonings and brought it. We were two of three American-born folks there, but it was very enjoyable; we sant Polish carols afterward, which was great, I miss singing them since we stopped going to the Polish language Mass. We were there two and a half hours.
I put away the Three Kings and also some more glittery decorations. On the way to the supermarket we also saw a neighbor taking lights off a tree in his front yard, but another house on the main road which still has pretty lights along the front fence. Christmas is still on.
"Moth's leaning against the stone wall of a ruined building. He seems to be watching the last of the light, but he's not really here; his thoughts are beyond the horizon.
Are you okay? What's on your mind? Shall we go now and just get some sleep? I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted.
Me too, but lately I've realized that it doesn't matter how tired I am, I can't miss times like this. I have to hold on to every moment I can.
But if you get too tired you won't be able to, you'll be sleeping through all the moments. As I say it, the memory of his endless sleeping before we left Cornwall floods my mind. The days lost in a fog of exhaustion and the doctor's warnings of 'don't get too tired'. It's taken every ounce of his willpower to get him to where we are now; I fear that extra hour of physical effort, or even the wind in the wrong direction, will be enough to send him right back to where he started from, or even further down.
I might have said the same before we left, but this trip has taught me something about all of this - the living, the dying, the void in between. It's not about how long it lasts, it's about the value of each moment. It's like one of your pans of mushroom soup.
It's almost completely dark, on the edge of an island stuck out in the North Sea, a chilly north-easterly wind blowing in from Scandinavia, and he's comparing life and death to a pan of soup.
What?
It takes loads of mushrooms, so you only ever make enough for two bowls, but it's full of such deep and complex flavours - thyme and garlic, and earth - that it doesn't matter. That one bowl is enough, because it holds so much.
Earth? That's probably the compost I haven't washed off the mushrooms.
You don't have to do that.
Do what?
Whenever I mention death, you joke about it, or change the subject. Don't you get it? It's part of the soup. There's always more flavour when the mushrooms are about to go off: it makes the soup so much richer.
I might not make that soup again, not if it makes you think of earth and death, it's tomato from now on.
You know I see right through you, don't you?
I know. But you also know this trip's always been about gathering the ingredients for a great soup.
It's already good soup.
The very best soup.
We walk away as darkness falls, somewhere in the void between life and death, that place where we all exist."
Landlines, by Raynor Winn
I hope it's not illegal to print this here!
It dawned on me I haven't said much about Christmas. Well, you know how overwhelmed we get with goodies from my brother's customers - that did not happen this year, although we certainly got plenty of cookies and candy. More than most people receive, but not - for us - a ridiculous amount. And the Polish lady made a gingerbread! Why didn't I think to mention that? I don't know, and I was sure I'd taken a photo of it, but it's nowhere, so I guess I didn't. She gave me the recipe last year (although I never made it) but now that she knows I like gingerbread, perhaps she'll always give us a one. That is fine with me.
And speaking of gingerbread, I made this recipe today for muffins. I used a gluten-free flour mix and left off the lemon glaze. They are nice, but a little plain and I'm thinking of how they could be fixed up a bit. Still, the most interesting thing about this recipe, I think, was her advice on baking temperatures; she says if you bake muffins at a high temperature at the beginning, they will rise up nice and high, and then you lower it. I will try to remember this for all subsequent muffin recipes to test it out.
It worked on these!
I 've been reading Raynor Winn's Landlines. It's been out since September, but not in the U.S. and I was so afraid they wouldn't publish it here! But I've got it now, and I think it must be a UK edition, since the cover says "The Sunday Times bestseller".
Anyway, I'm almost done with it. All I can say is, read The Salt Path, if you have any small interest in it - and then read the other two. She is a born writer, but would be unknown if it weren't for her husband's illness and their treks along these trails in Britain. I can't say enough for these, her writing, the moving way she describes their difficult situation, the way she goes by her instinct and how things turn out when she does. It's amazing, and so human. I wish them all the best, and more. Read these!
A Happy New Year to everyone! We're having very mild weather, with predictions of sixty degrees on Wednesday. It's nice, but - a bit of snow would make it seem more like Christmas.
This photo is as grainy as it can be, but - it's too cute; the minute Daisy hears the sound of the sweater defuzzing machine, she comes flying in. Today she was so into it that she kept sitting on the sweater I was trying to defuzz.
After a priest recently told me that the animals are also made in the image of God (honestly, he didn't say it exactly in those terms, but I can't recall precisely). I am trying to see them in a newer, deeper light. Of course, I already knew that just because God made them, they had importance, but there was something about the way Father worded it. I hadn't thought about it in quite that way. So, little Daisy-Waisy was being a cat and a youngster, and investigating. I need to laugh about these episodes and enjoy the whole business. And then, in Malcolm Guite's Waiting on the Word, is the poem for today,
The Bird in the Tree, by Ruth Pitter.
The tree, and its haunting bird,
Are the loves of my heart;
But where is the word, the word,
Oh, where is the art,
To say, or even to see,
For a moment of time,
What the Tree and the Bird must be
In the true sublime?
They shine, listening to the soul,
And the soul replies;
But the inner love is not whole,
And the moment dies.
Oh, give me before I die
The grace to see
With eternal, ultimate eye
The Bird and the Tree.
The song in the living Green,
The Tree and the Bird -
Oh have they ever been seen,
Ever been heard?
The week following the big holiday is very quiet, after all the busyness - it seems odd, but it's necessary, I think. I finished reading a Brother Cadfael mystery, Dead Man's Ransom. I couldn't remember who the murderer was - thought it was someone else - but that isn't why I re-read them anyway; it's the whole story, and her telling of it. It was great!
The weather today was so beautiful, up into the forties, but sunny and it felt much warmer. I went outside and quickly re-pruned the rugosa. I hadn't cut it back far enough, and when the snow piles up, the canes will break without proper pruning. I was out there with only a cardigan because it took just a minute or two; I got a few rosehips while I was at it.
The Christmas season is wonderful! A client of my brother's brought in a bottle of maple syrup from his own trees in Vermont, where they have another place. Lovely!
It's the feast of St. Thomas a Becket; he was supposedly murdered at the suggestion of Henry II, who was king after Cadfael's day, but not very long after. I recently obtained a used copy of Murder in the Cathedral, by T.S. Eliot:
Twas in the moon of wintertime.
When all the birds had fled,
That God the Lord of all the earth
Sent angel choirs instead;
Before their light the stars grew dim,
And wandering hunters heard the hymn:
Jesus your King is born,
Jesus is born,
In excelsis gloria.
- from the Huron Carol
"Thus says the Lord God: Lo, I am sending my messenger, to prepare the way before me; and suddenly there will come to the temple the Lord whom you seek. And the messenger of the covenant whom you desire. Yes, he is coming, says the Lord of hosts.
Malachi 3:1
Annie was hanging around the baseboard heaters to try and warm herself, so we bought a couple of these cozy little retreats for the two cats, and it was a good purchase. They get used, especially by Daisy, but Annie also goes in to warm up and I expect she'll use hers much of tomorrow as it's going to only be in the teens during the day! She still insists on sitting at the back screen door, with the fresh air flowing in, every morning after breakfast, but then later we find her sitting on the dryer, or trying to walk on the heaters. These little "huts" were a good idea. Wouldn't it be nice to have a little thing like this to curl up in?
I put the radio on to the classical music station; they were playing the Christmas parts of Messiah. I cranked it WAY up.
Meanwhile, Daisy appeared on the shelving, and - see that candle on the right, in the iron holder? It was on the middle shelf, but she wants to chew everything that sticks up - I had to move it. So much for nice decor. But I was greatly into the music, and thought it was kind of interesting that they were playing every valley shall be exalted, and every mountain and hill made low. The crooked straight and the rough places plain. And this cat, leaping higher and higher, knocking things out of her way - it all seemed to fit somehow.
"The whole purpose of Advent is to be for a moment fully and consciously Before Christ. In that place of darkness and waiting, we look for his coming and do not presume too much that we already know or have it..... The core of the Christian faith, and indeed of Judaism before it, concerns a God who meets particular people in particular places, and from one small encounter builds a nation and changes everything."
- Malcolm Guite, Waiting for the Word
O Adonai and Leader of the house of Israel, who appeared to Moses in flames
of the burning bush and gave him the law on Sinai:
come and redeem us with outstretched arm.
Today I decided to make cookies instead of cleaning, or even making dinner - we got some soup and sandwich stuff at the store. I made totos, which take a while, but I love them and haven't had them for a few years.
They are Italian cookies my aunt used to make, and a woman who comes into the library gave me her recipe - they are exactly like Auntie Adeline's. If you want to make them, this is how:
Totos
Mix together 4 cups of flour, 1 cup of cocoa powder, 1/2 tablespoon (one and a half teaspoons) of baking powder, 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon and 1/4 teaspoon of cloves. Set this aside.
In the bowl of the mixer, blend one egg, one cup of cold coffee, 2/3 cup of oil, 2 teaspoons of vanilla, and 2 teaspoons each of orange peel and lemon peel. Then add the dry mixture a little at a time. Finally, mix in about one and a half cups of raisins.
Oil your hands and, with a soup spoon, scoop up some and roll it into a ball, medium sized. They don't spread in the oven. Bake them at 350 F.
Now, the lady who gave me the recipe apparently bakes her for 50 minutes. I do not! I had written on mine to keep them in for 25, but today I was experimenting, and I think 15 might be good enough. Let's say between 15 and 20 minute per batch.
When they cool, make a thin icing with powdered sugar and lemon juice - don't skip it! These cookies have many flavors in them, but they are good! Enjoy.
The O Antiphons begin tonight.
O Wisdom, coming forth from the mouth of the Most High,
reaching from end to end, mightily and sweetly ordering all things:
come and teach us the way of prudence.
I'm making very slow progress on my plaid skirt; at this time of year, there are multitudes of extra things to be done. You have to decide which thing to do.
Like make a batch of gingerbread spice. That was important.
When, in the mornings, I ponder all the things I'd like to do, need to do, feel I should do, etc., in the course of the day, I've been asking myself, what is it that you'll be glad you did, at the end of the day? That clarifies everything for me! It's the balance I'm always searching for.
I put on my gaudy Christmas apron today, and baked a gingerbread for a birthday cake next week. I did not use the aforementioned spice mixture, as I like the recipe as it is; it's something I pinned because I liked the way it looked. This is it, and it actually reminds me of something they used to sell at the grocery store when I was a kid, called Spanish Bar Cake - do you remember it? Do they still make it? It had raisins inside, and I think it was spicy - it may have been a gingerbread. I wouldn't want to read the ingredient list now, but it looked like this photo, and I'm sure that's what drew me to it. Anyway, mine is safely in the freezer, and I'll make the cream cheese frosting on Monday (the Spanish Bar cake had regular frosting, a "buttercream".)
I realize I don't mention the cats much. Dolly was very photogenic, and she was often surprising us in interesting ways. Daisy is so young and active that it's hard to get her to stop moving.
Anyway, there's a lot to do, isn't there?
For any birth makes an inconvenient demand; like all holy things.*
- from Christmas and Common Birth by Anne Ridler
*taken from Malcolm Guite's Waiting for the Word
It's snowing; we'll get maybe four inches. And it's going to be colder this week, in the thirties during the day. Now I feel like Christmas is really on the way. I know that's ridiculous.
I'm aiming to make a flannel skirt with a lovely plaid I got from Walmart. It's very nice quality; after washing and drying, there was no need to iron it! But - a strange thing. If you sew, and know a little something about woven fabric, you might have noticed that fabrics don't have any "give" along the selvage length, but there is some give if you snap it crosswise. Do you know what I mean? If you've ever taken material and snapped it sharply, you know which way is the length and which the width. That's why it matters how the pattern pieces are cut. Anyway, this fabric from Walmart has the give along the selvage! And no give across! It's the opposite of any I've ever seen. Opposite of how it's supposed to be, for that matter (sheets don't do this - there's no give either way, that I've even noticed). So I had to piece the waistband since I couldn't get a long enough piece across the width. Quite confusing!
I was looking up descriptions of plaid names; this seems to be a tartan.
This struck me this morning:
John announces the coming of the Messiah who will burn away in the fire of the Spirit - the fire of God's love - all that hides God's goodness in this world.
- Magnificat, December, 2022
Light-bearing Christ, come down to us,
And light in darkness sow;
Come down and save our fallen world
Whose sinful ways you know.
Prepare us for your light and truth,
Who watch and wait for you;
Restore our once lost dignity;
Come down and make us new.
Almighty Father, speak the word
Your children long to hear,
And with your Spirit dwell in us;
Lord God of love, draw near.
I picked up The Reed of God for Advent reading by Caryll Houselander: she speaks of inner emptiness, which is very different from that still, shadowless ring of light round which our being is circled, making a shape which in itself is an absolute promise of fulfillment.
How interesting a thought that is.
I'm not sure why I bother, because the sky never looks as fantastic in a photo as it looks to the eye.
The light was coming, and all these very dark clouds were going. It was so dramatic!
Meanwhile, I discovered that I was mistaken about youtube; they are not preventing people from linking to their content. They just changed the way it's done - you can't just highlight the URL and copy and paste it where you will; you have to click on "share" under the video and it gives you options. It may have always done that, but I didn't notice.
So,
Here is People Look East, all the verses, because I'm not sure Elizabeth knows it, and Clare says she doesn't. I will also provide a link to a lovely performance of it. The words to it are of Advent, but the sprightliness makes it feel like Christmas already. The link is in the title.
People, look east. The time is near
Of the crowning of the year.
Make your house fair as you are able,
Trim the hearth and set the table.
People, look east and sing today:
Love, the guest, is on the way.
Furrows, be glad. Though earth is bare,
One more seed is planted there:
Give up your strength the seed to nourish,
That in course the flower may flourish.
People, look east and sing today:
Love, the rose, is on the way.
Birds, though you long have ceased to build,
Guard the nest that must be filled.
Even the hour when wings are frozen
God for fledging time has chosen.
People, look east and sing today:
Love, the bird, is on the way.
Stars, keep the watch. When night is dim
One more light the bowl shall brim,
Shining beyond the frosty weather,
Bright as sun and moon together.
People, look east and sing today:
Love, the star, is on the way.
Angels, announce with shouts of mirth
Christ who brings new life to earth.
Set every peak and valley humming
With the word, the Lord is coming.
People, look east and sing today:
Love, the Lord, is on the way.
- by Eleanor Farjeon
It was time to take away the fall decorations; the little pumpkins were wrinkled up, anyway.
"For us, the ordinary people of the streets, obedience means bending to the ways of our times whenever they are not harmful...
When we surrender to them without resistance we find ourselves wonderfully liberated from ourselves...From the moment we wake up these circumstances take hold of us. It is the telephone that rings; it is the key that won't work, the bus that doesn't arrive or arrives full, or doesn't wait for us. It is the person sitting next to us who takes up the whole seat; or the vibration of the loose window pane that drives us crazy.
It's the daily routine, one chore that leads to another, some job we wouldn't have chosen. It's the weather and its changes - which is exquisite precisely because it is completely untainted by human doing. It's being cold, or being hot; it's the headache or the toothache. It's the people we meet and the conversations they choose to start. It's the rude man who nearly knocks us off the sidewalk. It's the people who need to kill some time, and so they corner us.
When we live with others, also means we set aside our own tastes and leave things in the place others have put them. In this way, life becomes an epic film in slow motion. Little by little, thread by thread, it eats away at the old man's frame, which cannot be mended and must be made new from the ground up. When we thus become accustomed to giving up our will to so many tiny things, we will no longer find it hard, when the occasion presents itself, to do the will of our boss, our husband, or our parents."
- Servant of God, Madeleine Delbrel
It was Thanksgiving today! It went well, I think, although the turkey breast was a little dry. I suppose I should buy turkey more often, so I can practice my technique.
A client of my brother's gave him an apple crumb pie yesterday, still warm! That was nice. I made pumpkin, and that is enough dessert for three people over sixty-five, with a few chocolates. We made sure the cats had turkey canned food.
Heavenly Father, gratitude fills our hearts today as we recall all you have given us. Keep us ever thankful and generous in your holy service.
- from Magnificat, November 2022
Today we celebrate the feast of Christ the King, on this last Sunday of the liturgical year. We sang this in church today -
At the Name of Jesus
Advent begins next Sunday - it is a time of preparation for Christmas. The church year follows the life of Christ; Advent, the time of waiting before his birth, begins the year in the same way that our lives begin at our conception, and those who wait for us to be born are busy preparing for us.
*I tried to link a choir singing the hymn, but youtube doesn't seem to allow it anymore.
There are three things in life which you can depend upon: death. taxes. And me forgetting to send Gail a birthday card. (why, oh why??)
All faded is the glowing light
That once from heaven shone,
When startled shepherds in the night
The angels come upon.
O shine again, ye angel host
And say that he is near;
Though but a simple few at most
Believe he will appear.
- from Magnificat, November 2022
