a little bit of spring

Debra gave me a very small braid "rug", for lack of a better word. It's just like a braided rug, but only a few inches in diameter, the size of a doily. But if I used it for a doily, the prettiest part would be covered. I've been wanting to hang it up without knowing quite how, but today I just propped it in front of a white dish in the secretary - it's firm enough that it shouldn't flop or slide down.

Just right for spring.

Seven Stanzas at Easter

Make no mistake: if He rose at all

it was as His body;

if the cells' dissolution did not reverse, the molecules

reknit, the amino acids rekindle,

the Church will fall.

It was not as the flowers,

each soft Spring recurrent;

it was not as His Spirit in the mouths and fuddled

eyes of the eleven apostles;

it was as His flesh: ours.

The same hinged thumbs and toes,

the same valved heart

that-pierced-died, withered, paused, and then

regathered out of enduring Might

new strength to enclose.

Let us not mock God with metaphor,

analogy, sidestepping, transcendence;

making of the event a parable, a sign painted in the
faded credulity of earlier ages:
let us walk through the door.

The stone is rolled back, not papier-mache,
not a stone in a story,
but the vast rock of materiality that in the slow
grinding of time that will eclipse for each of us
the wide light of day.

And if we will have an angel at the tomb,
make it a real angel,
weighty with Max Planck's quanta, vivid with hair,
opaque in the dawn light, robed in real linen
spun on a definite loom.

Let us not seek to make it less monstrous,
for our own convenience, our own sense of beauty,
lest, awakened in one unthinkable hour, we are
embarrassed by the miracle,
and crushed by remonstrance.


-    John Updike

Dolly turns eighty

I put the harness on Dolly today and out we went.

It was beautiful outside. She trotted and I followed; we crossed over the bridge and went to the end of the property. There are more violas across the brook, a deep purple color.

Then I picked her up and we came in. She was content after that.

She had a birthday the other day - her sixteenth. That's like 80 years old, in our years.

She is doing well.

especially at Easter

This page from a Sandra Boynton calendar has seen better days

but it's taped onto my desk area at work, and that's where it's staying.

before the lawn gets mowed

Little violas in the grass.

Praise to the giver of good!

O lover and author of concord,

Pour out your balm on our days;

Order our ways in your peace.

- from Magnificat, April 2019

yesterday's sorrows are this day's delight

Happy Easter!

Psalm 88

Lord my God, I call for help by day;

I cry at night before you.

Let my prayer come into your presence.

O turn your ear to my cry.

For my soul is filled with evils;

my life is on the brink of the grave.

I am reckoned as one in the tomb:

I have reached the end of my strength,

like one alone among the dead;

like the slain lying in their graves;

like those you remember no more,

cut off, as they are, from your hand.

You have laid me in the depths of the tomb,

in places that are dark, in the depths.

Your anger weighs down upon me:

I am drowned beneath your waves.

You have taken away my friends

and made me hateful in their sight. 

Imprisoned, I cannot escape;

my eyes are sunken with grief.

I call to you, Lord, all the day long;

to you I stretch out my hands.

Will you work your wonders for the dead?

Will the shades stand and praise you?

Will your love be told in the grave

or your faithfulness among the dead?

Will your wonders be known in the dark

or your justice in the land of oblivion?

As for me, Lord, I call to you for help:

in the morning my prayer comes before you.

Lord, why do you reject me?

Why do you hide your face?

Wretched, close to death from my youth,

I have borne your trials, I am numb.

Your fury has swept down upon me;

your terrors have utterly destroyed me.

They surround me all the day like a flood,

they assail me all together.

Friend and neighbor you have taken away:

my one companion is darkness.

Christ Crucified by Diego Velazquez

"we have what we seek"

"The reason why we don't take time is a feeling that we have to keep moving. This is a real sickness. We live in the fullness of time. Every moment is God's own good time, His kairos. The whole thing boils down to giving ourselves in prayer a chance to realize that we have what we seek. We don't have to rush after it. It was there all the time, and if we give it time, it will make itself known to us."

                                                  -   Thomas Merton, from Seeking God by Esther de Waal

orange tulips in the kitchen

My brother came home with a tulip from a client - what a nice thing!

I like seeing kitchens with a plant on the counter or windowsill; we have very little room for that, but I am making it work.

They are right at the sink - I just shifted everything over.

And they don't seem to bother my breathing!

blooming and glowing

The forsythia is in Full Bloom; it's really glowing!

All my fears are gone - I guess forsythia is a hardy plant.

the discomfort of another Holy Week

"I would like to welcome you all to the discomfort of another Holy Week."

This is the beginning of yesterday's blog entry from the Trappist monks, and it sure got my attention: it's here, if you want.

And "a Blessed Earth-shaking Holy Week to you all"!

excellent news

We had cat food hanging around that nobody was going to eat, so my brother brought it over to Diane's this evening. I was in the middle of something, but I told him to find out as much as he could about Mr. Kibble.

Well! They're doing work over there and the furniture's all over the place, and Mr. K. was under a table but he did come out to be rubbed and petted. And Diane said she even picks him up and hugs him! Oh, hallelujah!

Our little friend finally has a family - I am overjoyed.

spring growth on the trees at sunset

book vs. e-book

"Holding a book, discerning the fonts, touching the dry ink, feeling the thickness of the paper as one turns the pages, writing in the margins: All bring us into communion with author and message. We hold books, their heft a hint of their heft....Try doing that with your e-book."

                                  -    from a piece by Peter J. Travers in the current issue of National Review

happy dwelling

Though unseen, O Lord, I love you,

Wondrous is your saving might,

Thus to wean my soul so sweetly

From its sinful chief delight:

More you did in one short instant

Than a world could e'er have done,

Winning you a happy dwelling

In this sterile heart of stone.

-  from Magnificat, April 2019

thinking about soft food

When the oral surgeon had finished with me - I believe it took him less than ten minutes to remove three teeth - they handed me a small tote with instructions typed on a paper bag containing gauze, and an ice pack. But when I got home, I also saw a lip balm and the above box of macaroni and cheese in the bag, which was rather nice. I do look on this brand as junk food, but, Reader, I ate it.

I have less pain than I did yesterday. Thursday night my brother said I looked like I'd been chewing tobacco. :D  Yesterday, he compared my appearance to Clutch Cargo. But it's just on the right side. It's hard to open wide to eat, and I'm not sure if it's the tooth removal or the poking from the novocained needles that's causing the soreness - I don't suppose it matters. I started making up a list in my mind of soft foods that would be appealing, and healthy, rather than yogurt and gooey pasta for days on end.

• baked cod, or salmon
• well-steamed broccoli
• summer squash
• well-roasted winter squash
• hearty soups with soft veg and crackers broken into it for something more filling
• yogurt
• pudding
• soft toast with plenty of butter and jam
• hot (but cooled off) cereal - I like kasha
• sardines
• hummus
• eggs: poached, scrambled or an egg salad
• home-made macaroni and cheese
• baked potato
• twice-baked sweet potato
• cottage cheese
• a very ripe pear or mango
• avocado

For some reason I feel better just seeing such a list. I think I'll write it down for my recipe box.

"borrowed" from the internet

cuteness

I had three wisdom teeth out today, and was taking it easy for the most part. But I did go for the camera when I saw this little fellow out the front door.

Looking into the urn where I've got the bird seed. I took the picture, then let him be.

prayer in the middle of Lent

"Renew your people within and without, O Lord, and, since it is your will that they be unhindered by bodily delights, give them, we pray, perseverance in their spiritual intent."

                                                 - from Magnificat, April 2019

extremes of behavior

There's a fellow up the road who sells tires. His shop is behind another place and there's a bit of woods behind there. Periodically, my brother gives him bags of dry cat food - why? He has stray cats living inside the shop, and three of four shelters outside with a feeding station. We stopped by there after church to see; there was one sleeping in the window, a tough-looking ginger cat. They are safe in there, and cared for as much as he can. A good-hearted man!

I think the forsythia will bloom, after all! 


I think I was naughty today: at church, the pew I sat in had a stain on it from something dripping above. This is a recurring issue until the ceiling will be looked at, but my intent was to wet something to clean it off. I took my cotton handkerchief, but rather than go all the way downstairs to a sink, I dipped it in the holy water and used that. My knee has been suffering badly from arthritis lately, and I didn't want to go all the way downstairs to the bathrooms, although I am much improved. I don't feel as guilty about this as I probably should. I keep thinking of King David eating the showbread; of course, one can always find (good) excuses for one's errors. As for the hanky, I dried it out and will wash it by hand tomorrow and use the water in a plant.

cutting

Tomorrow is the end of the month. Today was beautiful, in the seventies, I'm sure; March will go out like a lamb.

I could have washed another window, but I pruned the roses instead. Dolly came out with me and enjoyed it until the wild wind was too much for her. I was done anyway, and it was pointless to clean away the dead leaves in such wind. That can wait for another day.

I like pruning the roses. I like being deliberate when I cut each cane, each twig, with a particular result in view.

I have to admit that I don't take the same attitude toward cutting vegetables.

keep getting up

"A monk was once asked, What do you do there in the monastery? He replied: We fall and get up, fall and get up, fall and get up again."

                                              - from Seeking God: The Way of St. Benedict, by Esther de Waal

still blooming

The library's Christmas cactus is still in full bloom. (The link is from a three year old photo.) It did begin blooming in December, as it was supposed to, right when we were getting new carpeting and everything was in an uproar. I took some time off to avoid any new-rug smells which might have been bothersome, and expected I'd miss the flower show. When I came back to work, it seemed almost finished, but something made it rally and continue making buds - we don't know why! I checked it today and there are several more buds forming, so it isn't done yet. We're quite amazed.


I've finished reading the depositions from witnesses to the beginning of our War of Independence from Britain. As much as I love that era, I hadn't realized that there were provocations from the red coats which caused everything to escalate to the point of war; I guess I just thought that a war was the only way the forefathers could finalize the separation from the mother country.

"I, John Parker, of lawful age, and commander of the militia in Lexington, do testify and declare, that on the nineteenth instant*, in the morning, about one of the clock, being informed, that there were a number of the regular officers riding up and down the road, stopping and insulting people as they passed the road, and also informed that a number of the regular troops were on their march from Boston, in order to take the province stores at Concord, I ordered our militia to meet on the common in said Lexington, to consult what to do, and concluded not to be discovered, nor meddle, or make with said regular troops, if they should approach, unless they should insult or molest us; and upon their sudden approach, I immediately ordered our militia to disperse and not to fire. Immediately, said troops made their appearance, and rushing furiously on, fired upon and killed eight of our party, without receiving any provocation therefor [sic] from us."

The book contains quite a few accounts, all legal depositions, including that of Paul Revere, briefly describing his famous ride to warn the townspeople about the British. What Longfellow's wonderful poem doesn't get into is that our hero was accosted by the British afterward and told they'd "blow his brains out" - a familiar threat, according to many of these testimonies - but he said he had nothing to hide and told them what he'd been doing and they could do what they liked with him. They finally just confiscated his horse and he had to continue on foot. I'm glad this booklet crossed my path. It's enabled me to picture the circumstances of that night of ordinary men being extraordinarily brave. 

*almost everyone used this term, "instant", but not in the way we use it today

looking for the reward

"We desire to be paid for what we do; and when we are truly wise, we work for God: we choose that profession, of good works, which he patronizes, and we are certain of our wages....Religion and work should never be disjoined.

For every good work, every kindly thought, or tiny act of humble helpfulness, God gives a reward, a merited return of sustenance for our souls, or answer to our pleading for some purpose. The orderliness of heaven cannot be disturbed, and if our free will is not given wholly to the act, in a consecration clear and sweet, the corresponding mercy cannot approach us. ... It may be fatiguing to think of meriting at each step, but it also fatiguing to study Greek or Mathematics. The things of most worth are not cultivated without labor. And to imagine that it would be more generous to do something for God without reckoning at all upon a merciful return from him of any sort, is not intelligent virtue...for God will give mercy in return to every act worthy of reward."


                        -  Rose Hawthorne, daughter of Nathaniel Hawthorne and foundress of the Dominican Sisters for the Care of Incurable Cancer

Sweetie reads a magazine

or gives a good imitation of it.

something to attain to

"The eyes of peacemakers are watchful, caring eyes and their fellow wayfarers find warmth in them like people at the fireside. They never find a motive for fighting because they know that they are only accountable for peace and peace is not preserved through battles.

They know that dividing a single atom can unleash cosmic warfare.

They also know that there is a chain that links human beings together and that when one human cell is torn by anger, jealousy or bitterness, the reaction of war can rebound to the end of the universe.

But because they believe in spreading love, they know that whenever a little peace is created, there is planted a virus of peace that is strong enough to infect the whole earth."


                                              -  Madeleine Delbrel

one clean window - a beginning

Today was another beautiful day, in the fifties. I was just about to wash the floor when I had the idea to wash a window. Just one. In March.

You may recall that I never cleaned the windows last fall - last October was not conducive to window-washing. It's always my habit to do them in May and October if I can. You see, I like to wait for a day of mild breezes, such pleasant air that you just long to hang outside your windows and breathe it in. That's usually in May and October.

But weather isn't predictable anymore, is it? I realized I need to think outside the box, to seize my opportunities when they come.

So, when I also remembered that I had to hard-boil some eggs for my brother's lunch tomorrow, I set them on to boil and cleaned one of the kitchen windows. I took my time; I thoroughly enjoyed it. Then I washed the floor.

I have no idea when the next window-washing opportunity will arrive. I will look forward to it.

proof that spring is really coming

I saw two robins in the front yard on Monday.

what turns us away from praying

"Prayer consists...in an interior attention and a conversion of the heart, because what turns us away from God and keeps us from praying is less the number of words than it is the number of desires or worries that preoccupy us."

                                         - Cardinal Jean Danielou

log cabin quilt

I decided a couple of weeks ago that I needed a sewing project. I have lots of scraps, so I am making a log cabin quilt. You can see how wonky my work is - this is how I operate. We will see how it turns out. I've got twenty eight squares, and I think I'll add one more strip and then stitch it all together. I feel very good about using up so many scraps! In this square are pieces from four dresses, one skirt and a pillow cover.

a little unexpected bit of history

Somebody returned an inter-library loan this morning while I was at the main desk. It was a small book, or booklet, of eyewitness accounts from the revolutionary days: Paul Revere's ride, the Concord fight, Battle of Lexington. It says, "Being the depositions and narratives of PERSONS WHO PARTICIPATED".  (caps their idea, not mine!) 

So exciting! Oh, did I say that I cancelled the return of this book to the owning library and checked it out to myself? Did I need to say that?

caught red-handed

Picture taken through the curtain, in a hurry. He's actually sitting in the bowl of seed, which is in this urn. Hey, I don't mind - it's been cold.